your higher self is calling you home

I know I am meant to access my truth and to express it through creative being. 

I know I am not meant to be anesthetized.

I know am meant to feel deeply, and to heal through feeling.

I know that I am here to teach others how to access power within themselves. 

I know that I am here to teach others how to heal themselves so that they can help heal the world. 

I am a fully charged cell of undying light emitting truth.

I am one of ONE.

I AM.

These statements came from my journal. I share them because they are convictions felt deeply and resonant with the energy of intention. Do any of them resonate with you? 

I have always been driven to find answers to big questions, like, 

• Is there something more to this life? What is my purpose? 

• Am I alone in having experiences that I can’t explain? 

• Is there anyone who can help to answer my questions? 

In part, it is these questions, in combination with a host of otherworldly experiences throughout my life as well a denial of myself, that led to feeling misunderstood by others and not fitting in with the culture at large, that led to an existential crisis - a Dark Night of the Soul. 

It was one of the scariest, loneliest, and darkest times of my life. There was a part of me that wanted to leave this world, and that led me down a self-destructive path. When I finally plummeted to my lowest point, I heard a voice, and I was given a choice to continue on my current trajectory, one possibly leading to early death, or be what I came here to be: a creative, healing voice in the midst chaos.

I was always meant for this path, and now I clearly see that, but before I could commit to it, I had to go through an annihilation.  

The way back from this hell felt like going through a grinder at times, experiencing awakenings that brought on cycles of intense highs and lows, diving into shadow aspects of myself to unearth remnants of traumas, healing essential pieces of my being, all the while having experiences that were profoundly spiritual in nature, but for which I felt I could share with few. 

I look back and marvel at the woman who made that trek - that version of me that was so strong and so hungry to do whatever it took to align with my Higher Self, with Source. Every day for which my evolving sense of commitment and discipline prevailed earned me a deep trust in myself and Spirit, and light began to cut through the darkness.  

The silver lining is this: As intensely painful as it was, I am so grateful for my process now . . . after the fact. I have become the one I knew existed within. I am full of self-trust, self-respect - both of which I have come to feel are the meaning of self-love. Now, I see that feeling like the world was at odds with me, and me reacting in not-so-healthy ways, was because I did not understand that all change begins within. 

Everything happens as it is meant to happen, so no regrets. Even so, I wonder if my progress could have been perhaps a little quicker and a lot less lonely if I had discovered my spiritual coach earlier in my process. She was a pivotal part in helping me to feel less like I was bobbing in a void and more like I was swimming for bright, promising land, discovering my authentic power along the way, and discovering me in the process. And that, my Kindred Soul, is what I know I can be for you.

We are all part of a larger whole, and every individual's experience and contribution is unique and valuable. We are ALL creators. We are ALL healers. Our modes and natures may vary, and in that is the beauty and ingenious way of Source. As extensions of that very stuff of Creation, we are indeed called to serve, create, and heal in ways that benefit the GREATER GOOD. 

Have you wondered - felt - that you are somehow not being fully you? Do you feel something deep inside that feels off, like there is something more? Are you experiencing things that you feel like you can’t share with others for fear of being judged, things that can’t be explained rationally?

I might be able to help.

I would love to talk to you.